This is the story of Conjurella Con II. No, the blood has
dried now; the Conjurella memories are no more. Gone the voices:
"Lift him up!", gone the memory, gone the blood.
It is a decade beyond 1963 now: ten years are passing. No
longer Dallas, but Toronto. David Ferrie is dead. We are free.
No, this is the story of Cosmicon II, the last weekend of
January, 1973, a comic book convention held at Winters College,
part of York University in Toronto, an extravaganza that would
include future Tonight Show guest host, P. J. O'Rourke, Ted
Nugent, the first computer game installed in North America (in
the basement of Winters), and, at the last moment, the
blood-stained legend, T. Casey Brennan
No, this is the story of women named A, of abbreviated names,
of Vampirella, of the Absinthe Cafe, of secrets and legends and
This is Cosmicon II. The sixties that spilled the blood of
John Kenedy were over. A memory. A blurred vision of high school
years, followed by the early sales of fiction stories by T. Casey
Brennan...was the first a cover-featured story in the Major
Magazines/Candar Men's Group men's magazine Charger, Feb.
1968? (they left out the "T" on my name on the cover),
or was it "Family Curse" in Jim Warren's Eerie
Who knows? This is 1973. David Ferrie is dead; Dallas is an
aborted memory, a dream that couldn't be.
But Cosmicon II will be the scener of another murder, the
murder of the mind of the greatest comic book publisher that ever
lived, Jim Warren. A quarter century later, a zine called Hungry
Freaks would publish Jim's accouint of a condition which
seemed to attack his central nervous sysytem, a condition which
left him helpless as his company was led to ruin, and a
court-ordered Chapter VI bankruptcy.
Dr. E is close behind; I can feel his cold presence. Jim
Warren has taken to publishing a great many of my stories. Dr. E
is displeased. I am so unsure of myself; the sudden conversion
from being a shy country boy with few friends and a secret life,
to an overnight celebrity for the award and award nominations I
received for "On the Wings of a Bird", drawn by the
late Jerry Grandeneeti, in Creepy #36, November 1970
issue, all at the New York Comic Art Convention at the Statler
Hilton in July of 1971. I stepped off the stage at the awards
presentations, with the Ray Bradbury Cup of Warren's own Frazetta
Awards, and nominations for both the Comic Art Fan and Shazam
Academy of Comic Book Arts awards.
Eerie #38 carried pictures of me receiving that trophy
in 1972; I think there are copies of that issue floating around
Cosmicon II. Flash-bulbs popped, fan journalists stormed me with
tape recorders, mikes, and questions, and a new era was born in
my life. Somehow, I imagined that, in and amongst the sad,
melodramatic artistry I had perfected -- Warren's letter columns
referred to "the classic T. Casey Brennan allegory",
and compared me to Dali and Rod Serling -- I could drop little
hints and clues of those secrets I carried so well.
One of my Warren stories began with a man who resembled me
leaning out the window with a rifle, thinking "Something's
going to happen soon...", but I didn't know then, not all
the time, couldn't bear the Conjurella memory yet.
Some months earlier, I had written "shadow of
Dracula" for Warren's Vampirella comic book; it was
recently reprinted by Harris Comics, who bought Jim's properties
at auction after a court-ordered bankruptcy, as Vampirella of
Drakulon #3, in May 1996. It was about the Van Helsings from
the Bram Stoker classic, Dracula, it's back in 1897, and
they're attempting to create a blood serum to cure vampirism.
Comic book writers often like to emphasize certain words in
bold-face, and when I showed Daddy, I had emphasized the words "The
Project" on the manuscript, in a reference to this
Daddy points at the words "The Project", and
says: "You can't do that."
I say: "Why not?" Then I stare in bewilderment, but
inside, that bewilderment is a lie.
Deep within, the Conjurella memory lurks; deep within, the
truth that cannot be: I am only a boy, shy, frail, sensitive,
artistic, but it was my hand that pulled the trigger. Kidnapped,
drugged, tormented, injected: I am the true cold, dark legend,
Lee was innocent. I killed the President. I shot John Kennedy.
Daddy growls the name of Dr. E.
Closer comes the Conjurella memory; Daddy is right, I know,
but I don't know how, can't remember how Dr. E could loom forth
from the 1950s to forbid me to write something in a comic book in
In one world, The Project is the Port Hope office of
MK-ULTRA, a hellish reality of forced drug and hypnosis
experiments on children, that will lead to the asassination of
In another world, The Project is a component in a
vampire comic, a skillful plot device involving a cure for
Vampirella, from the socially inept but brilliant comic book
writer that many readers now feel is Jim Warren's best ace: T.
The two worlds must not collide, but they do, only for a
moment, and I say, inexplicably: "I'm not a little boy any
more. He can't tell me what to do any more."
And now it is 1973 Toronto. Time has washed away the blood;
Dr. E's injections have washed away the memory. Kennedy is a name
in a history book, like Howard Leslie Brennan. I carry no guilt,
no shame, no recollection of the blood here: JFK in this
world was killed by a lone nut with a defective weapon and no
I never knew him. I never wept. Not here, not now, not in the
parallell world of Toronto, 1973.
In the days preceding Cosmicon II, I had met, first Asian A,
then American A, and fallen in love with them both. They weren't
spies, public figures, or comic book publishers, so to put them
among the Necronomicon Monks, they must be half known and half
concealed: Pretty girls named A____ who loved me, once.
Now they are gone, like their love for me. Now they
are memories; now their words of love are as distant as Dr E's
words of torment, or Jim Warren's words of praise for my comic
Once they were real. The taste of memories is bittersweet. In
November of 1972, Asian A and I took the train to Toronto. Asian
A put her head on my shoulder; there is a scent and a taste to
Asian women easily as intoxicating and as addictive as opium. It
Cannot be washed off; it cannot be concealed, and even now, the
scent of an Asian woman will set my heart pounding, and my lungs
hyper-ventillating. The story of the Necronomicon Monks is truth,
but it is absurd truth, so I will take this one step further, for
this also is true: if an Asian girl, particularly a pretty Asian
girl (which would include about eight out of ten of them), enters
my space, I will know where she is, what hallways she has walked
down, what rooms she has entered, by scent alone.
But this was the story of the Necronomicon Monks. Daddy's
stories for Street & Smith's 1940s pulp magazine Love
Story were one of the few things that he ever did that I
liked. It was also one of the few things he ever did that he
didn't somehow figure out a way of using against me. I'd seen
Letters to Daddy from Love Story editor, Daisy Bacon; I
think she published only two of his stories, under the
authorship, Bill Brennan. But he was there, in the
pulps, like Cthulu, Conan, and L. Ron Hubbard, like Lovecraft's
hypothetical book of sorcery, the Necronomicon. And in 1973, I
was developing a strange, lethal obsession with black magic, that
went far beyond the fictional devices we all used for the stories
in the Warren magazines, Creepy, Eerie, and Vampirella.
The Necronomicon has always been a subject for debate among
the followers of Lovecraft and the pulps. Some say Lovecraft
created the Necronomicon, like L. Ron Hubbard's former literary
agent, Forry Ackerman, created Vampirella. Others say it was an
actual book of ancient sorcery, that Lovecraft had discovered and
decided to use in his stories in another 1940s pulp, Weird
Tales. In this latter category is found this legend: The
Necronomicon was discovered by the Holy Office of the
Inquisition, and sealed behind stone in a monastery in
Tibet...even they, who could slaughter thousands of their own
kind, still feared its dark power.
No: I bear the Dulles Stigmata: protracted delusions of a
religious or occult nature, which are the trademark symptom of
those who were subjected to the CIA's illegal mind-control
experiments of the 1950s, directly overseen by CIA Director, and
later Warren Commission member, Allen Dulles.
But this is Toronto in 1973. This is Cosmicon II. Dallas is a
decade in the past, and the basement room where I would remember,
and write Conjurella, is more than two decades in the
future. In that fateful world-to-be of the nineties, I would make
contact with others who plausibly and recognizably (to me, who
had lived it) claimed to have been adbucted and abused by
MK-ULTRA. Yet, the stories would wane into occultism: terrifying
tales of unmistakable CIA abductions are peppered with the
absurd. Abductees, after presenting what would otherwise be
valuable testimony, go on to relate accounts of neighbors with
mind-reading rays, NASA officials with time machines, and visions
of Rose Kennedy as an ally of the assassins. Nor was I less guilt
in this also. Relating now, in the nineties, my memories of Dr.
E, and the real-life Project, I am constantly reminded
that in the seventies, I wrote essays for a variety of occult
publications, claiming to be the reincarnation of noted occult
figure, Aleister Crowley. This was as intended by the CIA. I also
carry the Dulles Stigmata. If we are all reincarnations of
Aleister Crowleys, time travelling through hell with NASA and
Rose Kennedy, then our testimony is far less plausible, except to
a very few.
But in Toronto in 1973, I am innocent: not still the assassin
of Dallas that no one saw, not yet the assassin of Conjurella
that no one believed.
Sometime after I fell in love with Asian A, and before
Cosmicon II, I met, and fell in love, with American A. American A
was pretty, but not really quite as pretty as Asian A, who was
indescribably gorgeous. Yet, American A was not without power
over me, and her power was words of love...promises and whispers,
her fine, slender strands of blonde hair brushing across my face,
so different from the thick, long, sleek black hair of Asian A.
In the days before Cosmicon II, American A spoke in promises
and whispers, swore she would love me forever, and begged me not
to go to Ontario, where she knew Asian A awaited me.
But within, there with the memory of Dallas, somehow concealed
and omnipresent, like Poe's Tell-Tale Heart, was he memory of
Linda. Like John Kennedy's blood, Linda's tears poured over me;
like the mythical Necronomicon of Tibet, Linda's memory was
sealed up in stone, sealed within.
Uncle Johnny was the bad uncle. Quite unlike Uncle Charley,
also of Columbus, Ohio, who had one wife, and one set of kids,
Uncle Johnny married and divorced and remarried frequently,
throughout his unlamented life. Some time in the early 1950s, he
married Aunt Bonnie, whom I immortalized with the fictional
appelation "Conjurella", in my story of the same name.
Her daughter was Linda, who was the same age as me; for a while,
she came to live with us in Avoca, Michigan. She was a perfect,
exquisite little girl, long blonde hair, a high I.Q., and an air
of placcid quality, even at the age of five. When she left us
with Aunt Bonnie, in 1953, shortly before I started school, she
wore white muffs with sugar cubes in them; that will always be my
archtypical memory of her, Linda and Aunt Bonnie leaving. It
would not be, it could not be, that fleeting glimpse of Linda,
that day in Dallas, that hallway on the sixth floor of the Texas
School Book Depository Building, that fleeting glimpse, so cruel,
as the MK-ULTRA operatives hustled her past so quickly.
But this was Toronto in 1973: Linda was only a whisper here,
from two decades past. Here my heart was filled with Asian A and
American A, as I drank heavily, autographing copies of Creepy
and Eerie, wandering through the maze of Winters College,
attempting to cope with my chaotic love affairs, my alcoholism,
and my new-found fame. Yet deep within, the memory of Linda
lurked, deep within, I knew: she, like me, had been of the chosen
ones. She, like me, had been born to kill, born to serve The
Project, born to kill John Kennedy for MK-ULTRA, born to
serve the hellish renegades of the Office of Strategic Services
who had chosen us to end the power of the Kennedy dynasty
Perhaps, sometimes when American A's blonde hair brushed
against my face, there was that whisper of a memory of Linda.
This was Toronto in 1973, this was an alternate world. I feared
the intense cold of Toronto in the parallell world of Cosmicon
II, 1973, and Winters College was a vast, unchartable labyrinth.
Sometimes, in my wanders through it, I would come upon a door
leading to the cold, white world outside. For a moment, I would
stare transfixed at the wind blowing little whisps of snow
through the bitter cold. Beyond those doors was the cold world
from which I had come, and the cold world to which I would
return. Beyond those doors was a cold past in which I had lost
Linda and shot President Kennedy, a cold future in which I would
remember, and transcribe, those things in the legend of Conjurella.
But within those doors was Cosmicon II, a world of Asian A and
American A playing tug-o-war with my heart, a world of adulation
for the poetic, panelled prose that had suddenly been evoked from
me, a world of comic book stars and comic book fans, a world with
no John Kennedy writhing in blood from my single, only shot, a
world where The Project was only a brief, emotion-packed
scene from Vampirella. Within the doors of Cosmicon II,
this was truth; the other world, the alternate world, where The
Project was a hell that MK-ULTRA had created for children,
was far behind and far before.
Yet, paradoxicly, obscenely, unfairly, in that alternate world
of Toronto 1973, Dr. E had stalked me, and now Jim Warren was his
target. Here ate Cosmicon II, I had found my Shangri-La, a world
of comic book and trivialities, a world of American A and Asian A
battling inside my head for my heart, a world with no blood of
JFK that I had spilled, no sinister designs of Dr. E and The
But somehow, beyond the lies, in the labyrinth of Winters
College, Dr. E lurked, stalking Jim Warren; somehow, beyond the
comic books, beyond the scent of Asian A and the whispers of
American A, the memory of The Project lurked.
"You're part of the New Frontier, Casey," Dr. E had
told me earnestly, in the presence of two associates, after the
Kennedy election victory of 1960.
To those who knew, but had been lied to,The Project was
the CIA's ultimate weapon against Castro's Cuba: a secret
invasion force which would combine the traditional warfare of the
past with the super-science of the future.
Lee believed. Major General Edwin Walker did not. Walker had
been a prominent activist for the right-wing John Birch Society,
which, in that era, had still been enamored of America's
Military, and America's espionage apparatus. MK-ULTRA had sought
a protective cover of rightists and paramilitarists, standing
ready with their own troops, to aid in the supposed
"invasion of Cuba". Those who did believe had
included American Nazi Party leader, George Lincoln Rockwell, the
scholarly but sinister Dr. Fred G. Schwartz of the Christian
Anti-Communism Crusade (which shared offices with the Fair Play
for Cuba Committee in New Orleans), and martial arts expert Bruce
Lee, hell-bent on liberating his people from the murderous brand
of communism which had overtaken China.
But Walker had refused altogether, and Lee, under orders from
David Ferrie, his commanding officer in the Civial Air Patrol,
had fired on Walker and missed, deliberately, as a warning. Lee
believed, but Walker did not. George Lincoln Rockwell, chess
player, essayist, Nazi leader, friend: he believed also.
("Get Lincoln out of that Nazi suit, and talk to him
man-to-man, and he's all right," someone had told me then.)
"Call George and tell him the invasion is off,"
David Ferrie said, light-heartedly, after the assassination.
Someyears later, Rockwell would write, sympatheticly, "Casey
thinks he's a Jew but he's not."
But Rockwell, like Edwin Walker, like Bruce Lee, like Lee
himself, would perish. The sicties would claim the lives of
George Lincoln Rockwell and Bruce Lee; Walker would die later,
Rockwell would be shot outside a laundromat, by one of his own
men, in a virtual coup-de-tat by the CIA, which would place the
American Nazi Party squarely in the camp of the Kennedy
assassins, directed no longer by their own eccentricities, but by
the very government which they had purported to oppose. Major
General Edwin Walker would be stalked and homosexually raped at a
freeway rest stop,, by men who would later identify him as a
willing participant; he died shortly thereafter, the pain and
humiliation were too great.
And Bruce Lee: the cut-outs of memories, the fleeting glimpses
of a past somehow lost, like that fleeting glimpse of Linda...
That fleeting memory; no before, no after, just the memory. We
are in a hotel room, somewhere. It is before the JFK
Lee is there, like Bruce. They have both seen the children,
Dr. E's children, sitting limply in chairs with needles in their
necks, headsets on their ears, screens before their vacant faces.
Dr. E says: it is necessary: child assassins formed with the
super-science of the future, child assassins, a proud tradition
of both sides of the now concluded great warr, child assassins
necessaruy for the invasion of Cuba. It has already grated on
Lee; later, he will seek a friend and confidant in Dallas police
officer, J.D. Tippitt, whom he will tell.
But for Bruce, it is intolerable now.
"Get rid of the kids," Bruce says, "We don't
Lee sits, staring downward, his hand on his forehead, wearing
that sly, secret smile, only ever-so-slightly visible.
"I can't," Lee says softly, and matter-of-factly.
Bruce side-steps into position and gestures toward me.
"Get rid of the kid," Bruce says, "Get him out
of here. Take him home. Lose him. Anything."
"I can't," Lee repeats, like deja vu.
Bruce begins a series of blocks, cries, and kicks.
I look at Lee questioningly with drugged vision: Dr. E or
David Ferrie must have injected me again, recently.
Lee says, chuckling, "Well, Bruce goes a little crazy
like that sometimes. There's nothing we can do. It will
Under the hypnotic drug, I take these words literally, not as
a joke, a game. I wait, horrified, for Bruce's supposed attack to
pass. After, Lee says to Bruce, in earnest: "That was great.
That was magnificent."
But this is Toronto in 1973: this is Cosmicon II. I never knew
them here. The air-tight doors of Winters College seal out the
cold, the wind, the drifting snow, seal out the tormented past of
Dallas, seal out the bleak future of Conjurella. Within these
doors, there are no memories of the aborted invasion, no memories
of the single shot which my hand fired, no memories of Christian
Anti-Communism or Fair Play for Cuba...only comic books, and fans
of my Warren stories, only the spectral phantasms of American A
and Asian A, not present, but there in spirit, battling for the
heart of T. Casey Brennan, not the child assassin, but the poet,
not the pawn of Dr. E and MK-ULTRA, but the pawn of pretty girls,
touching, whispering, promising, their hair in my face, their
scent in my nostrils.
Here, in this sealed off world of Winters College in 1973, T.
Casey Brennan was not the secret assassin; he was Archie, torn
between Betty and Veronica; he was not the drugged, helpless pawn
of Dr. E, he was Dobie Gillis, lost in philosophy and love
Yet, Dr. E lurked, even here. Inexplicably, Jim Warren had
been strip searched by customs officials, upon entering Canada,
en route from New York. What did they know, what did they
suspect? What motives did they attribute, what foul plans did
Initially, it had seemed impossible to make it to Cosmicon II,
where I had received an invitation to appear, complete with
complimentary room at Winters College; Winters College, where the
doors could block not only cold, but memories...
And American A, who still loved me then, had begged me not to
go. But go I did, riding into Port Huron with a friend that
morning. I call a Canadian taxi from Port Huron, ride across the
Blue Water Bridge, and soon, I am at the Canadian National
Railway station in Sarnia. Or maybe I went to Asian A's apartment
before the train station; I don't know anymore, I'm not a
witness, I can't remember.
The Sarnia-based taxi is called "A Stan-Lee Taxi".
The driver gives me his card, and later, I show it at the
convention, as a take-off on the name of the Marvel Comics
publisher known as Stan Lee.
The driver lays a rap that could be entitled: "Great Tips
I Have Been Given". He tells me of a rider employed by a
tire manufacturer, who ships him a full set of tires, later, as a
He wants comic books. But soon I will have no comic books.
Soon, the bleak future of Conjurella will propel me into a
network of hippie communes, homeless shelters and free meals.
Soon, the insulating doors of Winters College willinsulate me no
more. I sent him no comic books, though I may have promised.
I board the train for Toronto in Sarnia. I watch, sad and
melancholy, as the Canadian countryside and the memories flicker
I am alone now. Not the sleek black torrents of hair of Asian
A on my shoulder now, not the promises and whispers of American
A, only sadness, when there should have been hope.
Within are the memories, forgotten, but not gone, like a word
on the tip of one's tongue, but somehow out of consciousness,
somehow out of reach.
In the last days of David Ferrie's life, in mid-1966, and
early 1967, David Ferrie met with us on several occassions. I was
always drugged and hypnotized during those meetings, so the words
would just barely filter through, in little bits and fragments. I
was no credible witness, then or now. But I knew Dr. E and David
Ferrie were creating a disease to attack Africa. It must have
been 1966 when David Ferrie told me they had successfully
"It's going to fly!" David Ferrie said of the AIDS
virus, grinning proudly. Daddy smiled a sheepish smile, and
nodded. He was afraid then. So am I. Even now.
But within the insulating doors of Winters College awaited the
Absinthe Cafe. The memories are non-sequential now, blurred
visions of comic books, Jim Warren, fellow celebrity guests, and
probably the most outstanding performance ever given by noted
rock musician and hippie deerslayer, Ted Nugent.
Nugent did not socialize with us, but future Tonight Show
guest host P.J. O'Rourke drank that night at the same table with
Jim Warren, me, and a second-rate comic book writer named Denny
O'Neil. The subject of a controversial underground newspaper
called Screw comes up, then managed by Jim Buckley and Al
Someone, I think Denny O'Neil, says: "Jim Buckley, he's
the real intellectual behind that operation." At some point,
Al Goldstein will be arrested in Cuba and charged by Fidel Castro
with being a fellow CIA agent.
And then someone says, "The Mafia does a pretty good job
of distributing it."
P.J. O'Rourke frowns, sips his drink, and says, "Yeah,
until they take it over."
But my mind is on American A, on the promises and whispers.
She wants me to leave Asian A, wants me to marry her, wants me to
believe in witchcraft, as she does...
And within, the Dulles Stigmata lurks, like the scars of Dr.
E's needles in my neck. In the Hebrew bible, the serpent who
tempts Eve is NChSh, and the Messiah yet to come, is MShYCh. In
Hebrew, every letter is a number also, hence, the Qabbaliastic
science of Gematria, the study of the letters and the numbers.
Hebrew is called, by its proponents, a mathematically correct
language: words with the same numeration, are words with the same
meaning, in spite of any apparent differences, which must be
resolved by meditation.
The Dulles Stigmata lurks. NChSh is Nun (50), Cheth (8), Shin
(300), 358. MShYCh is Mem (40), Shin (300), Yod (10), Cheth (8),
358. Brennan, transliterated into Hebrew, is Beth (2), Resh
(200), He (5), Nun (50), Nun (50), Aleph (1), Nun (50), 358.
The Dulles Stigmata lurks. Amwerican A wants me to believe in
magic, and I do. And in timeless time, beyond Dallas, beyond
Toronto, beyond the 60s, or the 70s, or the 90s, the words form:
I am the Last Witness. I speak great things and blasphemies. I am
the first to shoot, and the last to testify. I wash clean the
blood. They must have given me clues as to how they made it;
somehow, somehow, I know, AIDS was begun in Dachau...the torture
was only incidental, a means to an end. Somehow, it was necessary
to break down the resistance of human flesh through torture, so
that such a condition, flesh without natural defenses, flesh
without immunity, could be duplicated in a laboratory. And Dr. E
was an Osteopath; was Osteopathy only a cover, or was it a
component in the creation of the virus that the World Health
Organization would later spread, in vaccines, throughout Africa?
Later, in the 1980s, the World Health Organization would write
about me in their Geneva-based journal, World Health, in
their October 1983 (page 30) and January-February 1986 (page 9)
The Dulles Stigmata lurks, and soon, I will be attempting to
duplicate the exact style of roaring twenties occultist, Aleister
Crowley, in a variety of occult journals, both great and small.
This The Dulles Stigmata lurks, but for now, in the Absinthe
Cafe, there is no memory of the blood of John Kennedy, only the
memory of American A's kisses, and I want to call her, to tell
her again that I love her. Somehow, I find my way through the
labyrinth that is Winters College, to a wall with two (or is it
three) secluded pay phones. I call American A in Michigan, and
breathe the most oft-repeated phrase of my youth.
"I love you."
She is sad. She wanted to bolt from Michigan and follow me to
Toronto.. "Don't be surprised if I show up there, after
you," she says before I leave for Cosmicon II. She asks me
to swear that I will love her always, and that I will always be
true to her. And I do swear. It is only half a lie. I can love
her always, but I cannot be true.
I return to the Absinthe, and this is mystery.
Jim Warren says he has called for a prostitute to be sent to
"To a man like me, time is money," Warren says,
"I don't have time for the kind of courtship that you
All of the guests, including myself, were provided with
complimentary rooms at Winters College, and to anyone who
remembers Cosmicon II from the guests of honor's perspective, any
prostitute who could find the damned rooms on her own, would have
to be considered a possible CIA agent from the gitgo.
Warren leaves, and returns shortly. He remarks to me are
Suddenly inexplicable, out of rational context.
"Well," Jim Warren says, "I want to keep using
your stories, but she says I can't. She says I have to get rid of
This is the way home:
It would be a matter of split-second timing. I would take the
train from Toronto to Sarnia, where Asian A would meet me. I
would stay overnight with her, then, in the morning, she would
take me across the Blue Water Bridge to Port Huron, to the bus
station, where I would take the bus down M-21 as far as Emmett,
to the cemetary at Bricker Road. There, Americvan A would meet
me, and drive me the rest of the way home.
In the morning, at Asian A's, I hear Crocodile Rock on
the radio, a song they played so frequently on the radio whilke
American A and I would be parked in front of my parents' house,
making out. I am sad, and full of longing: will I lose American
A? Will I let her love, her promises and whispers, slip away, for
the sake of holding Asian A?
I go down on Asian A in the morning; I hardly have time to
pull my tongue out of her vagina before she speeds me to the Port
Huron bus station. We just make it, and I get on the bus to
Emmett just before it leaves. There is no time to wash my face,
rinse my mouth, no time for anything at all.
The bus lets me off at the cemetary at Bricker Road and M-21,
where both my parents will someday be buried. American A arrives,
a few minutes late. She leaps from the car, and embraces mwe,
beaming. I resist her, only so slightly.
"Don't you want to kiss me?" she exclaims.
Then her tongue is raping my mouth, and her blonde hair is in
my face, which I have just pulled from Asian A's pussy.
There was so little time.
This is the way of conjecture:
To those who believe, anything proven by the Qabballah is true
absolutely. There is simply no question.
Hypothetical Jim Warren enters the room at the end of the
labyrinth, the prostitute on his arm. With mock impulsiveness,
she embraces him, giggling, and her ringed finger finds his neck.
It is only a pin-prick at first that he feels there, a jagged
fingernail, perhaps, a harmless scar of love. But suddenly, there
is the weakness; he wants to pull away, wants to question, wants
to wonder at this, but he cannot.
There is so little time.
The girl counts the seconds as hypothetical Jim Warren, all
but overcome now, succumbs to the tiny hypo concealed in her
ring. A decade later, he will be a virtual invalid, as the deadly
MK-ULTA poison accomplishes the long-term job for which it was
At last, hypothetical Jim Warren slumps to the floor. It does
not matter; he will not remember.
Dr. E enters with two henchmen, nods to the prostitute
matter-of-factly, and says:
"So this is the great Jim Warren."
But as hypothetical Jim Warren falls, I rise up, the Dulles
Stigmata gnawing at my soul, as the ring poison has on his. I am
the cold, dark one. I am the Last Witness. I wash clean the